Saintly Chuckles: Exploring the Lighter Side of Mormon Jokes

Delve into the world of Mormon humor with this entertaining collection of jokes that offers a lighthearted glimpse into the unique culture and beliefs of the Latter-day Saints.

From witty quips about temple attendance to playful puns on pioneer life, these jokes celebrate the joy and camaraderie found within the Mormon community.

Whether you’re a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints or simply curious about Mormon culture, these jokes are sure to bring a smile to your face and perhaps even a hearty chuckle.

Mormon Jokes

Mormon Jokes
  1. Why don’t Mormons ever make resolutions on New Year’s Eve? Because they’re already too busy sticking to their religion!
  2. How do you know if a Mormon is lying? If their lips are moving!
  3. Why did the Mormons cross the road? To avoid the missionaries knocking on his door!
  4. How many Mormons does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they’ll just wait for it to come to them.
  5. Why don’t Mormons ever play hide and seek? Good luck hiding when you have a Book of Mormon in every hotel room!
  6. What did the Mormon say to the bartender? “I’ll have a water… with a splash of obedience!”
  7. Why did the Mormons go to art school? To learn how to draw a perfect family portrait!
  8. What do you call a Mormon who’s also a magician? A latter-day saint of hand tricks!
  9. Why did the Mormon go to therapy? To figure out how to deal with all those extra wives in heaven!
  10. What do you call a group of Mormon men walking in single file? A single file of saints!
  11. Why did the Mormon bring a ladder to church? Because he heard the higher the climb, the closer to God!
  12. How do you find out if a Mormon is from Utah? Don’t worry, they’ll tell you!
  13. Why did the Mormon couple stop attending couples therapy? Because they already had enough elders in their marriage!
  14. How many Mormons does it take to change a lightbulb? Just one, but he’ll need two more to confirm it!
  15. Why don’t Mormons ever go on roller coasters? They prefer to stick to the straight and narrow path!
  16. What’s a Mormon’s favorite type of music? Gospel… and anything by The Osmonds!
  17. Why don’t Mormons ever win at poker? Because they always fold at the first sign of revelation!
  18. How did the Mormon find his car keys? He prayed about it and they miraculously appeared in his scripture bag!
  19. What do you get when you cross a Mormon and a baker? A missionary position!
  20. Why did the Mormons bring a chicken to church? To show that he’s really good at laying eggs… or to make some holy chicken soup!
  21. How do you get a Mormon to stop drinking all your soda? Put a sign on it saying, “Hot drinks!”
  22. Why was the Mormon basketball team so good? Because they always had an extra player on the court… the Holy Ghost!
  23. Why did the Mormons refuse to play cards? Because he heard the deck was stacked against him… with caffeinated beverages!
  24. What do you call a Mormon who takes up gardening? A latter-day saint of the soil!
  25. Why did the Mormons go to the doctor? To get a prescription for “eternal health”!
  26. What do you call a Mormon on a bicycle? A latter-day saint on wheels!
  27. Why don’t Mormons ever get lost? Because they have GPS… God’s Personal Spirit!
  28. Why don’t Mormons ever make a mess in the kitchen? Because they always clean as they go… straight to heaven!
  29. Why did the Mormons refuse to watch scary movies? Because they didn’t want to give the devil any ideas!
  30. How does a Mormon count sheep? By saying their prayers before bed!
  31. Why did the Mormons become an astronaut? To spread the gospel… to the moon!
  32. What did one Mormon say to the other in the gym? “Are you working on your celestial body?”

Mormon Dad Jokes

  1. Why did the Mormon chicken join the church choir? Because it had a great “peck”-uliar voice!
  2. How do you know if a Mormon is on a diet? Don’t worry, they’ll “temple” you all about it!
  3. Why don’t Mormons ever make good detectives? Because they always avoid the “ward”!
  4. What do you call a Mormon who plays basketball? A “hoop-servant”!
  5. Why don’t Mormons ever go on cruises? They’re afraid they’ll end up on the “seas and lamentations”!
  6. Why did the Mormons refuse to play hide and seek? Because they always get found by the “Bishop”ric!
  7. How do you organize a Mormon party? You “stake” out a good location!
  8. Why did the Mormons go to art school? To learn how to “paint” the town with righteousness!
  9. What do you call a group of Mormons stuck in a snowstorm? A “frozen chosen”!
  10. Why don’t Mormons ever get lost? Because they always have a “Moroni” GPS system!
  11. What did one Mormon say to the other while playing Monopoly? “Looks like you’ve landed on the ‘Celestial Kingdom’ – time to pay up!”
  12. Why don’t Mormons ever play hide and seek in the forest? Because good luck hiding from the “Elder-trees”!
  13. Why did the Mormons bring a ladder to church? Because he heard the sermon was going to be “uplifting”!
  14. What’s a Mormon’s favorite type of music? Hymn-nastics!
  15. Why don’t Mormons ever bet on horse racing? Because they don’t believe in “stake” races!
  16. How many Mormons does it take to change a lightbulb? Three – one to change it and two to go on a mission to spread the light!
  17. Why did the Mormons bring a ladder to the baseball game? Because he heard the Angels were in the outfield!
  18. Why don’t Mormons ever eat fast food? Because they prefer the “Latter-Day” feast!
  19. What did one Mormon say to the other when they couldn’t find their car keys? “Looks like we’ll have to ‘pray’ for help!”
  20. Why did the Mormon refuse to go to the bakery? Because he heard they were selling “devil’s food” cake!
  21. Why don’t Mormons ever tell secrets on the phone? Because they know it’s not a “conference call”!
  22. What’s a Mormon’s favorite kind of tree? A “family tree”!
  23. Why did the Mormons bring a map to the library? Because he heard they had a lot of “Book of Mormon” references!
  24. Why don’t Mormons ever get lost in the desert? Because they always follow the “Joseph Smith’s Footprints”!
  25. What do you call a Mormon who loves to garden? A “seed-bearer”!
  26. Why did the Mormon go to the orthodontist? Because he wanted to straighten out his “Latter-day Saint” smile!
  27. Why don’t Mormons ever play hide and seek with vampires? Because they always find them in the “stake” center!
  28. What do you call a Mormon who’s a huge fan of puzzles? A “puzzled saint”!
  29. Why don’t Mormons ever play cards on Sundays? Because they prefer to “deal” with spiritual matters!
  30. Why did the Mormon bring a flashlight to the church picnic? Because he heard they were having a “spiritual enlightening”!
  31. Why don’t Mormons ever gamble? Because they know the house always wins in “eternity”!
  32. Why did the Mormon bring a ladder to the basketball game? Because he heard the tickets were for the “nosebleed” section!
  33. Why don’t Mormons ever use email? Because they believe in “post”-mortal communication!
  34. Why did the Mormon become a gardener? Because he wanted to “cultivate” his spiritual growth!

Mormon Knock Knock Jokes

  1. Knock knock. Who’s there? Alma. Alma who? Alma glad you answered the door!
  2. Knock knock. Who’s there? Joseph. Joseph who? Joseph Smith, your friendly neighborhood missionary!
  3. Knock knock. Who’s there? Angel. Angel who? Angel Moroni, reporting for doorbell duty!
  4. Knock knock. Who’s there? Nephite. Nephite who? Nephite-n-tidy, here to share a message about cleanliness!
  5. Knock knock. Who’s there? Liahona. Liahona who? Liahona a minute, I’ll just consult my compass to find the punchline!
  6. Knock knock. Who’s there? Nephi. Nephi who? Nephi-r fear, for I am with you!
  7. Knock knock. Who’s there? Doctrine. Doctrine who? Doctrine and Covenants, have you heard the good news?
  8. Knock knock. Who’s there? Temple. Temple who? Temple, come inside and feel the spirit!
  9. Knock knock. Who’s there? Brigham. Brigham who? Brigham Young at heart!
  10. Knock knock. Who’s there? Zion. Zion who? Zion’s your door, ready to spread some love!
  11. Knock knock. Who’s there? Prophet. Prophet who? Prophet’s knocking, will you let me in?
  12. Knock knock. Who’s there? Restoration. Restoration who? Restoration this church to its former glory!
  13. Knock knock. Who’s there? Priesthood. Priesthood who? Priesthood power, let’s make some blessings happen!
  14. Knock knock. Who’s there? Quorum. Quorum who? Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, here to preach and teach!
  15. Knock knock. Who’s there? Family. Family who? Family home evening, let’s gather ’round for some fun!
  16. Knock knock. Who’s there? Deseret. Deseret who? Deseret book of jokes to share with you!
  17. Knock knock. Who’s there? Moroni. Moroni who? Moroni-ng, let’s talk about the Book of Mormon!
  18. Knock knock. Who’s there? Seagull. Seagull who? Seagull, seagull, save your crops!
  19. Knock knock. Who’s there? Pioneers. Pioneers who? Pioneers of the past, forging paths for the future!
  20. Knock knock. Who’s there? Tithing. Tithing who? Tithing your blessings, one knock at a time!
  21. Knock knock. Who’s there? Relief. Relief who? Relief Society, is here to lift and serve!
  22. Knock knock. Who’s there? Convert. Convert who? Convert, join us in spreading the good word!
  23. Knock knock. Who’s there? Mission. Mission who? Missionaries, spread joy wherever they go!
  24. Knock knock. Who’s there? Fasting. Fasting who? Fasting and praying, seeking blessings from above!
  25. Knock knock. Who’s there? MTC. MTC who? MTC, preparing missionaries for service worldwide!
  26. Knock knock. Who’s there? Faith. Faith who? Faith in every footstep, leading us on our journey!
  27. Knock knock. Who’s there? Bishop. Bishop who? Bishop, let’s chat about your spiritual welfare!
  28. Knock knock. Who’s there? Temple Recommend. Temple Recommend who? Temple Recommends you uphold high standards!
  29. Knock knock. Who’s there? Fast Sunday. Fast Sunday who? Fast Sunday, time to skip breakfast and feel the Spirit!
  30. Knock knock. Who’s there? Scripture. Scripture who? Scripture study, nourishing our minds and spirits!
  31. Knock knock. Who’s there? Restoration. Restoration who? Restoration of the gospel, bringing light and truth!
  32. Knock knock. Who’s there? CTR. CTR who? Choose the right and open the door to blessings!
  33. Knock knock. Who’s there? Sacrament. Sacrament who? Sacrament meeting, where we renew our covenants!
  34. Knock knock. Who’s there? Modesty. Modesty who? Modesty is always in fashion, inside and out!
  35. Knock knock. Who’s there? Holy Ghost. Holy Ghost who? Holy Ghost, prompting us to answer the door of our hearts!
  36. Knock knock. Who’s there? Eternal Life. Eternal Life who? Eternal Life, the ultimate reward for faithful living!

Mormor Pioneer Jokes

  1. How did the Mormon pioneers pay for their journey west? With “wagon” loads of determination!
  2. Why did the Mormon pioneer bring a ladder on the Oregon Trail? Because he heard there were high “stakes”!
  3. Why did the Mormon pioneer bring a map to the desert? Because he wanted to find the “holy” land!
  4. Why don’t Mormon pioneers ever play cards on the wagon train? Because they know the “deal” always leads to temptation!
  5. How did the Mormon pioneers communicate with each other on the trail? Through “wagon”-train telegraphy!
  6. Why did the Mormon pioneer refuse to wear a hat? Because he didn’t want to be accused of having a “pioneer complex”!
  7. Why don’t Mormon pioneers ever get lost in the wilderness? Because they always follow the “spiritual compass”!
  8. What did the Mormon pioneer say to the river crossing? “Let’s make like the Israelites and part ways!”
  9. Why did the Mormon pioneer bring a broom on the trail? Because he heard they were sweeping the nation with their faith!
  10. How did the Mormon pioneers keep their spirits up during the long journey? With plenty of “trail” mix and hymn-singing!
  11. Why did the Mormon pioneer bring a telescope on the trail? To keep an eye on the “celestial” navigation!
  12. What did the Mormon pioneer say to the buffalo? “Excuse me, but could you please ‘bison’ the trail?”
  13. Why did the Mormon pioneer bring a compass on the trail? Because he wanted to make sure they were always heading in the “righteous” direction!
  14. How did the Mormon pioneers stay cool during the summer heat? They just kept their “faith” in the journey!
  15. Why don’t Mormon pioneers ever get tired of walking? Because they know they’re “following in the footsteps” of their ancestors!
  16. What did the Mormon pioneer say to the mountain? “Move over, I’ve got a wagon train to get through!”
  17. Why did the Mormon pioneer bring a book on the trail? Because he wanted to catch up on his “pioneer stories”!
  18. How did the Mormon pioneer know they had reached their destination? They saw the sign that read, “Welcome to Zion – Population: Faithful!”
  19. Why did the Mormon pioneer bring a hammer on the trail? Because he heard they were building a “foundation” for the future!
  20. What did the Mormon pioneer say to the rattlesnake? “Pardon me, but could you please ‘rattle’ off somewhere else?”
  21. Why don’t Mormon pioneers ever travel alone? Because they know there’s strength in “pioneer numbers”!
  22. How did the Mormon pioneer make coffee on the trail? They didn’t – they preferred their “brew” from the Book of Mormon!
  23. Why did the Mormon pioneer bring a mirror on the trail? To reflect on their journey and see the “faithful” faces of their fellow travelers!
  24. What did the Mormon pioneer say to the prairie dog? “Excuse me, but could you please ‘dig’ us a trail?”
  25. Why don’t Mormon pioneers ever run out of water on the trail? Because they know the “living water” will sustain them!
  26. How did the Mormon pioneers keep their spirits up during the storms? With a hearty chorus of “Come, Come, Ye Saints”!
  27. Why did the Mormon pioneer bring a rope on the trail? To “lasso” in any doubts or fears along the way!
  28. What did the Mormon pioneer say to the cactus? “Excuse me, but could you please ‘prickle’ off somewhere else?”
  29. Why don’t Mormon pioneers ever worry about getting lost in the wilderness? Because they know they’re always guided by a “higher” power!
  30. How did the Mormon pioneers celebrate reaching their destination? With a big “Pioneer Day” celebration, of course!

Final Words

In a world often filled with seriousness, it’s refreshing to find moments of levity and laughter.

Through these jokes, we not only celebrate the rich traditions and values of the Mormon community but also recognize the universal human experience of finding humor in everyday life.

So, whether you’re attending a ward gathering or simply sharing a laugh with friends, remember that a good joke can bring us closer together and remind us of the shared bonds that unite us all.

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