Hilarious Jokes About the Dallas Cowboys That Will Have You Cheering

Dive into the lighter side of sports fandom with our collection of uproarious jokes about the Dallas Cowboys.

From their quest for a decent defense to navigating the playoff drought, these one-liners and puns celebrate the humor that helps fans cope with the highs and lows of supporting America’s Team.

Whether you’re a die-hard Cowboys enthusiast or just in need of a good laugh, this collection promises to entertain and tickle your funny bone.

Get ready for a touchdown of laughter as we tackle the lighter side of the Dallas Cowboys’ journey on and off the field.

Jokes About The Dallas Cowboys

Jokes About The Dallas Cowboys
  • Why did the Dallas Cowboys go to the bank? To get their quarterback!
  • What do you call a Cowboys player with a Super Bowl ring? Old enough to retire.
  • Why don’t the Dallas Cowboys drink tea? Because the Cowboys can’t hold onto a cup.
  • What’s the difference between the Dallas Cowboys and a dollar bill? You can still get four quarters out of a dollar bill.
  • How do you keep a Cowboys fan quiet on game day? Take away their remote control.
  • What do you call 53 millionaires sitting around a TV watching the Super Bowl? The Dallas Cowboys.
  • Why did the Dallas Cowboys fan bring a ladder to the game? To see their team’s performance.
  • Why did the Cowboys fan cross the road? To get to the second half.
  • How many Cowboys fans does it take to change a light bulb? No, they’re happy living in the Patriots’ shadow.
  • Why do Cowboys fans make terrible detectives? Because they can never find a good defense.
  • What do you call a Cowboys player with a championship ring? A thief.
  • How do you stop a Cowboys fan from beating their head against the wall? Take away their season tickets.
  • Why did the Cowboys fan refuse to play hide and seek? Good luck hiding when your defense can’t cover anyone.
  • Why did the Cowboys coach go to the bank? To get his quarterback changed.
  • What’s the difference between the Dallas Cowboys and a pinball machine? The pinball machine scores more points.
  • Why did the Cowboys player bring a ladder to the game? To reach the high expectations.

Dallas Cowboys Jokes One Liners

  • Why did the Dallas Cowboys bring a ladder to the game? To reach the playoffs.
  • How do the Cowboys count to 10? 0-1, 0-2, 0-3…
  • Why don’t the Cowboys drink coffee? Because they can’t hold onto a cup.
  • What’s the Cowboys’ favorite play? The Hail Mary, hoping for a miracle.
  • How many Cowboys fans does it take to change a light bulb? No, they’re used to living in the Patriots’ shadow.
  • Why was the Cowboy’s playbook stolen? Because even thieves need a good laugh.
  • What’s the difference between the Cowboys and a dollar bill? You can still get four quarters out of a dollar.
  • Why did the Cowboys player go to art school? To learn how to draw a decent defense.
  • What do the Cowboys and a possum have in common? They both play dead at home and get killed on the road.
  • Why did the Cowboys player go to therapy? To tackle his issues.
  • How do you confuse a Cowboys fan? Ask them to name the Cowboys’ latest Super Bowl victory.
  • Why did the Cowboys install a mirror in their locker room? So it looks like they have more championships.
  • What’s the Cowboys’ favorite type of music? Country – because they can’t seem to find a good beat.
  • Why don’t the Cowboys use the internet? They can’t find the net to catch anything.
  • Why did the Cowboys fan go to school early? To see the Super Bowl banners during show-and-tell.
  • How many Cowboys players does it take to change a tire? Just one, unless it’s a blowout, then the whole team shows up.
  • Why did the Cowboys player bring a pencil to the game? In case they need to draw up a new game plan.
  • Why don’t the Cowboys need a website? They already have enough hits.
  • What’s the Cowboys’ idea of a balanced diet? A touchdown in each quarter.

Jokes About The Dallas Cowboys Losing

  • Why did the Dallas Cowboys apply for a job at the bakery? Because they kneaded dough – but they’re used to getting “rolled” on the field.
  • What do you call a Dallas Cowboys player with a championship ring? Lost.
  • Why did the Dallas Cowboys player bring a ladder to the game? To climb out of the bottom of the standings.
  • What’s the Cowboys’ favorite dance move? The Loss-step.
  • Why don’t the Cowboys use the internet? They can’t find the “net” to catch a break.
  • Why did the Dallas Cowboys player bring a map to the game? To find the end zone – they seem to have lost it.
  • How do the Cowboys spend their offseason? Looking for the W they lost during the regular season.
  • Why did the Cowboys fan bring a pillow to the game? For the “rest” of their team’s performance.
  • What’s the Cowboys’ favorite board game? Sorry! (Because they’re always apologizing for their losses.)
  • Why did the Dallas Cowboys player get a job at the movie theater? To learn how to watch a good performance.
  • What’s the difference between the Cowboys and a vacuum cleaner? The vacuum cleaner has a chance to clean up.
  • How do you make a Cowboys fan stop smiling? Tell them the score.
  • Why don’t the Cowboys have a team photo? Because it’s hard to take a picture of someone losing.
  • What’s the Cowboys’ favorite movie? “Gone with the Wins.”
  • Why did the Cowboys player bring a dictionary to the game? To understand the definition of “victory.”
  • How do you break a Cowboys fan’s heart? Give them a mirror and ask them to name the Super Bowls they’ve won recently.
  • Why did the Cowboys player go to therapy? To cope with their recurring nightmares of winning.
  • What’s the Cowboys’ favorite app? Yelp – because they’re always looking for a good review.
  • Why don’t the Cowboys have a website? They can’t handle too many hits.
  • Why was the Cowboy’s playbook sold at a discount? Because it only had pages on how to lose gracefully.

Final Words

In the unpredictable world of sports, finding humor in both victories and defeats is a universal language that brings fans together.

Our compilation of jokes about the Dallas Cowboys aims to celebrate the spirit of sportsmanship and the camaraderie that transcends wins and losses.

Remember, it’s all in good fun, and whether you’re a Cowboys fan or part of a rival tribe, let’s share a laugh as we navigate the rollercoaster ride of football fandom.

After all, in the game of jokes, everyone’s a winner!

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