Tickling Your Funny Bone: A Compendium of Hilarious Turkey Jokes

Unleash the power of humor this festive season with our curated collection of side-splitting turkey jokes.

This article serves up a delicious platter of puns, one-liners, and amusing anecdotes about our favorite feathered friends, promising to keep the laughter flowing as freely as the gravy at your next holiday gathering.

Turkey Jokes

Turkey Jokes
  1. Why did the turkey cross the road?
    • It was Thanksgiving Day, and he wanted people to think he was a chicken!
  2. What do you get when you cross a turkey with an octopus?
    • Enough drumsticks for Thanksgiving!
  3. What sound does a space turkey make?
    • Hubble, Hubble, Hubble!
  4. What do you call a turkey on the day after Thanksgiving?
    • Lucky!
  5. Why did the police arrest the turkey?
    • They suspected it of fowl play!
  6. What do you call a turkey with a fast rhythm?
    • A gobble-let!
  7. How do you keep a turkey in suspense?
    • I’ll tell you at Thanksgiving!
  8. Why did the turkey join a band?
    • Because it had the drumsticks!
  9. What happened when the turkey got into a fight?
    • He got the stuffing knocked out of him!
  10. What key won’t open any door?
  • A turkey!
  1. Why did the turkey sit on the tomahawk?
  • To try to hatchet!
  1. How did the Mayflower show that it liked America?
  • It hugged the shore!
  1. Who is not hungry at Thanksgiving?
  • The turkey, because it’s already stuffed!
  1. Why did the turkey play drums in his band?
  • Because he already had the drumsticks!
  1. How do you make a turkey float?
  • You need 2 scoops of ice cream, some root beer, and a turkey!
  1. Why can’t you take a turkey to church?
  • Because they use such fowl language!
  1. What did the mama turkey say to her naughty son?
  • If your father could see you now, he’d turn over in his gravy!
  1. Why don’t you let a turkey get near corn?
  • Because they have a tendency to gobble it up!
  1. What do you call a stuffed animal?
  • You, after Thanksgiving!
  1. What does Dracula call Thanksgiving?
  • Fangs-giving!
  1. What’s the best dance to do on Thanksgiving?
  • The turkey trot!
  1. Why was the turkey at the Thanksgiving table so proud?
  • It was stuffed!
  1. If the Pilgrims were alive today, what would they be most famous for?
  • Their AGE!
  1. What would you get if you crossed a turkey with an evil spirit?
  • A poultrygeist!
  1. What’s the best way to stuff a turkey?
  • Serve him lots of pizza and ice cream!
  1. What do you call a turkey the day after Thanksgiving?
  • Leftovers!
  1. Can a turkey jump higher than the Empire State Building?
  • Yes, a building can’t jump at all.
  1. What do you call a running turkey?
  • Fast food!
  1. Why did the turkey refuse dessert?
  • He was already stuffed!
  1. How can you send a turkey through the post office?
  • Bird Class Mail!
  1. What do turkeys like to do on sunny days?
  • Have peck-nics!
  1. What kind of weather does a turkey like?
  • Fowl weather!
  1. What would you get if you crossed a turkey with a baked fruit dessert?
  • Peach gobbler!
  1. What’s the key to a great Thanksgiving dinner?
  • The tur-key!
  1. What’s a turkey’s favorite type of math?
  • Gobble-ometry!
  1. How do you keep a turkey in suspense?
  • I’ll tell you at Christmas!
  1. What do turkeys use to clean their feathers?
  • Gobble-detergent!
  1. Why did the turkey go to the movie theater?
  • He wanted to see the latest peck-buster!
  1. What did the turkey say to the computer?
  • Google, Google, Google!
  1. What’s a turkey’s favorite dessert?
  • Peach Gobbler!
  1. Why don’t turkeys fly?
  • It’s too hard to get their big bodies off the ground!
  1. And finally, what did the turkey say before it was roasted?
  • Boy! I’m stuffed!

Turkey Puns

Turkey Puns
  1. I’m stuffed with happiness when I see you.
  2. Quit cold turkey? I’m not a quitter!
  3. Thanksgiving is all about the peas and hominy.
  4. I’m feeling gravy today.
  5. That’s poultry in motion.
  6. I cran hardly wait for Thanksgiving.
  7. I yam what I yam.
  8. Thanksgiving: Feast your eyes on this.
  9. Thanksgiving is plucking awesome.
  10. Gobble till you wobble.
  11. Why did the turkey sit on the tomahawk? It wanted to hatchet a plan.
  12. Turkeys are always stuffed because they eat like birds.
  13. Don’t chicken out; go turkey.
  14. Leftovers are for quitters.
  15. I’m all about that baste.
  16. The turkey isn’t vegan? Well, I’m stuffed.
  17. Turkey tastes fowl to vegans.
  18. Keep calm and gobble on.
  19. We offered the turkey some dinner, but he was already stuffed.
  20. You want a piece of me? – The Turkey.
  21. It’s leg day at the Thanksgiving table.
  22. I carrot believe it’s already Thanksgiving.
  23. Thanksgiving: Time to turnip the beet.
  24. Roll with the punches this Thanksgiving.
  25. Turkeys never go out to eat because they get stuffed at home.
  26. “I’m on a roll,” said the butter to the turkey.
  27. At Thanksgiving, I’m always on baste behavior.
  28. You butter believe I’m ready for Thanksgiving.
  29. The turkey said, “Pardon me” at the Thanksgiving table.
  30. Life is gourd when you’re a Thanksgiving turkey.
  31. The turkey was a real mash-terpiece.
  32. Thanksgiving is just one big poulty.
  33. The turkey felt gravy after being pardoned.
  34. The turkey’s behavior was truly fowl.
  35. Turkeys are always game for Thanksgiving.
  36. I’m pie-ning for more turkey.
  37. Talk turkey to me.
  38. Thanksgiving is a time to count your chickens before they’re hatched.
  39. The chef didn’t want to roast the turkey, but he had to wing it.
  40. The turkey didn’t want to go to the dinner, but he couldn’t chicken out.
  41. The turkey at our dinner always cracks us up – he’s a real gobble-getter!

Turkey Jokes One-Liners

 Turkey Jokes One-Liners
  1. Thanksgiving: The only day where it’s okay to be a butterball.
  2. My family told me to stop telling Thanksgiving jokes, but I said I couldn’t quit “cold turkey.”
  3. Why do turkeys always go “gobble, gobble”? Because they never learned good table manners!
  4. If a turkey got a fight, it would get the stuffing knocked out of it.
  5. The turkey at our Thanksgiving feast is always a gobble-getter.
  6. At Thanksgiving, my mom is the secret stuffing.
  7. The turkeys were up all night to get basted.
  8. This Thanksgiving, remember: if the stuffing is in the turkey, it’s already too late to defrost it!
  9. The Pilgrims hunted for fowl for days, but their efforts were all in “vein.”
  10. Leftovers are for “quitters.”
  11. Turkeys can’t read or write because they use “fowl” language.
  12. This Thanksgiving, may your stuffing be tasty and your turkey plump.
  13. I came in like a Butterball.
  14. I told my family I was going to make a vegan turkey; they said it was a “fowl” idea.
  15. You can’t be a turkey at Thanksgiving; you’d never make it to Christmas!
  16. If you call a large turkey a gobbler, what do you call a small one? Gobblet!
  17. My turkey puns are gravy.
  18. Why do turkeys always agree with you? Because they gobble heads!
  19. If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring? Pilgrims!
  20. Why did they let the turkey join the band? Because it had the drumsticks.
  21. Thanksgiving is great because people tend to speak less when food is lodged in their mouths.
  22. Don’t trust Thanksgiving recipes you read on the internet. They could be stuffing you with lies!
  23. The turkey asked to say grace: “Lettuce pray.”
  24. A turkey never voted for an early Christmas.
  25. Just think, in the middle of a turkey farm, you’re surrounded by peckers.
  26. How do you know the turkey at your dinner table is an optimist? It’s dressed and ready for the baste.
  27. All turkeys are stuffed with courage, but only on Thanksgiving.
  28. Pardon me for being so corn-bread.
  29. I can’t eat another bite; I am absolutely stuffed.
  30. Turkeys don’t give thanks, they give gobbles.
  31. The turkey has landed, and it’s out of this world.
  32. The best part about Thanksgiving is the gobble-ity.
  33. Pilgrims traveled thousands of miles to get out of cooking Thanksgiving dinner.
  34. Tofurky: for vegetarians who miss the taste of rubber.
  35. Don’t let Thanksgiving become thanks-gorging.
  36. Not all turkeys are created equal, some are more stuffed than others.
  37. My parents are the best cooks: I’m always stuffed when I leave their house.
  38. I got a turkey instead of a chicken, just to get more stuffing.
  39. Thanksgiving dinner without turkey is like a bird without feathers.
  40. How do turkeys see on the other side? They use their poultry-geist.
  41. Our turkey went cold turkey.
  42. I’m all about that baste.

Christmas Turkey Jokes

  1. What do turkeys like to eat at Christmas dinner?
    • Nothing, they’re already stuffed!
  2. Why did the Christmas turkey go to the disco?
    • He wanted to see if he could get himself a little “baste.”
  3. What do you get if you cross a turkey with a ghost at Christmas?
    • A poultry-geist!
  4. Why did Santa bring the turkey to Christmas dinner?
    • Because it had the stuffing!
  5. What happened when the turkey got into a fight at Christmas?
    • It got the cranberry sauce knocked out of him!
  6. Why was the turkey at the Christmas party so proud?
    • It was stuffed!
  7. What do you call a turkey the day after Christmas?
    • Lucky!
  8. How does Christmas Day end?
    • With the Yule log!
  9. Why did the Christmas turkey cross the road?
    • To prove he wasn’t chicken!
  10. Why do Christmas turkeys make terrible baseball players?
    • Because they only hit fowl balls!
  11. Why did the turkey join the Christmas band?
    • Because it had the drumsticks!
  12. What’s a turkey’s favorite Christmas song?
    • “Jingle Gobbles!”
  13. What do you get if you cross a turkey with a Christmas cracker?
    • A gobbledygook!
  14. Why did the turkey bring a suitcase to the Christmas party?
    • It was bringing the stuffing!
  15. Why was the snowman looking through the carrots at the supermarket on Christmas Eve?
    • He was picking his nose!
  16. How does a Christmas turkey answer the phone?
    • “Wing, Wing! Merry Christmas!”
  17. What do you call a frozen turkey at Christmas time?
    • A brrr-d!
  18. What do you call a turkey after Christmas?
    • Leftovers!
  19. What do you call a running turkey during the Christmas period?
    • Fast food!
  20. Can a turkey jump higher than the Empire State Building on Christmas?
    • Yes, a building can’t jump at all.
  21. What’s a turkey’s favorite Christmas carol?
    • “Gobble Bells!”
  22. How do you make a Christmas turkey float?
    • You need 2 scoops of ice cream, some root beer, and a turkey!
  23. What do turkeys like to do on Christmas Day?
    • Have peck-nics!
  24. What kind of weather does a turkey like at Christmas?
    • Fowl weather!
  25. What’s the key to a great Christmas dinner?
    • The tur-key!
  26. What did the turkey say to Santa Claus?
    • “Gobble, gobble, gobble!”
  27. Why did the turkey dress up as a Christmas tree?
    • It was trying to spruce things up!
  28. Why was the turkey at the North Pole?
    • It was trying to gobble up the Christmas spirit!
  29. What happened when the turkey got into a fight with Santa Claus?
    • It was Claus for alarm!
  30. What did Santa Claus say to the turkey?
    • “Ho, ho, ho! Merry Gobble-mas!”
  31. What’s a turkey’s favorite part of Christmas dinner?
    • The stuffing!
  32. What do you call a turkey that’s in a band?
    • A drummer stick!
  33. What’s a Christmas turkey’s favorite dessert?
    • Ice cream and Christmas cookies!
  34. What did the turkey say to the computer at Christmas?
    • “Google, Google, Google!”
  35. Why don’t you let a turkey get near the Christmas presents?
    • Because they will gobble them up!
  36. Why did the Christmas turkey join a choir?
    • It had the right stuffing!

Turkey Dad Jokes

 Turkey Dad Jokes
  1. Why did the turkey cross the road?
    • Because he wanted people to think he wasn’t chicken!
  2. Why did the turkey sit on the tomahawk?
    • To hatchet a plan.
  3. Why did the police arrest the turkey?
    • They suspected it of fowl play.
  4. What sound does a turkey’s phone make?
    • Wing, wing!
  5. How do you keep a turkey in suspense?
    • I’ll tell you next week!
  6. Why don’t you ever invite a turkey to dinner?
    • Because it’ll gobble up everything on the table.
  7. What do you call a turkey after Thanksgiving?
    • Lucky!
  8. Why do turkeys lay eggs?
    • Because if they dropped them, they would break.
  9. What happened when the turkey got into a fight?
    • It got the stuffing knocked out of it!
  10. What do turkeys like to do on a sunny day?
  • Have peck-nics.
  1. What do you call a turkey that flies really high?
  • An oven dodger.
  1. What happened to the turkey who got into a fight with a chicken?
  • He got pecked!
  1. What do you get when you cross a turkey with a banjo?
  • A turkey that can pluck itself!
  1. Why did the turkey join a band?
  • Because it had the drumsticks!
  1. What happened when the turkey met the chicken?
  • It was a fowl encounter.
  1. What do you call a turkey the day after Thanksgiving?
  • Leftovers!
  1. Can a turkey jump higher than the Empire State Building?
  • Yes, a building can’t jump at all.
  1. Why did the turkey break up with his girlfriend?
  • He wasn’t ready to commit fowl play.
  1. How can you make a turkey go “moooo”?
  • Teach it to impersonate a cow.
  1. What do you call a turkey the day before Thanksgiving?
  • Scared!
  1. What do you call a running turkey?
  • Fast food!
  1. What do you call a turkey who’s good at math?
  • A bird of pray.
  1. How do you keep a turkey in suspense?
  • I’ll tell you at Thanksgiving!
  1. Why did the turkey join the space program?
  • To prove he wasn’t chicken!
  1. What do you call a stuffed animal?
  • You, after Thanksgiving!
  1. Why can’t you take a turkey to church?
  • They use FOWL language.
  1. What did the turkey say to the rooster when he saw a plate of scrambled eggs?
  • “Boy, talk about mixed kids!”
  1. What do you get if you divide the circumference of a turkey by its diameter?
  • Turkey pi!
  1. What do you call it when it rains turkeys?
  • Fowl weather.
  1. Why did the turkey refuse to be a scarecrow?
  • He had the stuffing scared out of him once already!
  1. Why did the turkey join the football team?
  • He wanted to learn the quarter peck.
  1. What’s the turkey’s favorite song?
  • “Gobble Get It” by Marvin Sapp.
  1. How do turkeys see on the other side?
  • They use their poultry-geist.
  1. Why don’t turkeys get invited to parties?
  • They gobble all the snacks.
  1. Why was the turkey at the Thanksgiving table so proud?
  • It was stuffed!

Thanksgiving Turkey Jokes

Thanksgiving Turkey Jokes
  1. Why did the police arrest the turkey?
    • They suspected it of fowl play.
  2. Can a turkey jump higher than the Empire State Building?
    • Yes, a building can’t jump at all.
  3. Why did the turkey cross the road?
    • It was the chicken’s day off.
  4. Why did the turkey join the band?
    • Because it had the drumsticks!
  5. What do you call a turkey on Thanksgiving?
    • Stuffed!
  6. What key has legs and can’t open doors?
    • A turkey.
  7. If April showers bring May flowers, what do Mayflowers bring?
    • Pilgrims!
  8. Why do turkeys always go, “gobble, gobble”?
    • Because they never learned good table manners!
  9. What’s the best dance to do on Thanksgiving?
    • The turkey trot!
  10. What would you get if you crossed a turkey with an evil spirit?
  • A poultry-geist!
  1. What did the turkey say before it was roasted?
  • “Boy, I’m stuffed!”
  1. What happened to the turkey that got into a fight?
  • It got the stuffing knocked out of it!
  1. What’s a turkey’s favorite dessert?
  • Peach gobbler!
  1. What do you call a running turkey?
  • Fast food!
  1. What kind of weather does a turkey like?
  • Fowl weather!
  1. Why do turkeys lay eggs?
  • Because if they dropped them, they would break!
  1. What do turkeys like to do on a sunny day?
  • Have peck-nics!
  1. Why did the turkey sit on the tomahawk?
  • To hatchet a plan!
  1. Why did the turkey cross the playground?
  • To get to the other slide!
  1. What do you get when you cross a turkey with a banjo?
  • A turkey that can pluck itself!
  1. Why did the turkey refuse to be the dinner at Thanksgiving?
  • Because it would have to give up its drumsticks.
  1. What’s more amazing than a talking turkey?
  1. What sound does a space turkey make?
  • Hubble, hubble, hubble.
  1. Why did the scarecrow adopt the turkey?
  • Because it was already stuffed!
  1. How can you make a turkey float?
  • You need 2 scoops of ice cream, some root beer, and a turkey!
  1. Why did the cranberries turn red at Thanksgiving?
  • Because they saw the turkey dressing!
  1. How do you keep a turkey in suspense?
  • I’ll tell you at Thanksgiving!
  1. What would you get if you crossed a turkey with a ghost?
  • A poultrygeist!
  1. What do you call it when you drop a turkey from a helicopter?
  • Dead weight.
  1. Why did the turkey play drums in his band?
  • Because he already had the drumsticks!
  1. What do you call a turkey after Thanksgiving?
  • Lucky!
  1. Why did the turkey volunteer to be the main dish at Thanksgiving?
  • Because he felt like he could really bring something to the table.
  1. What’s the most musical part of a turkey?
  • The drumstick.
  1. Why did the turkey go to the therapist?
  • It needed someone to hear it gobble on about its problems.
  1. How did the Mayflower show that it liked America?
  • It hugged the shore!
  1. Why did the turkey get a timeout?
  • For using fowl language!
  1. What do you get when you cross a turkey with an octopus?
  • Enough drumsticks for Thanksgiving!
  1. What did the turkey say to the hunter on Thanksgiving Day?
  • “Quack, quack!”
  1. Why did they let the turkey join the band?
  • Because it had the drumsticks.
  1. What’s the best song to sing when preparing your turkey?
  • “All About That Baste.”

Final Words

We hope you enjoyed these rib-tickling turkey jokes, and we trust they’ll find a place at your table alongside the mashed potatoes and cranberry sauce.

Remember, laughter is the best seasoning, and these jokes are sure to make your next festive event a memorable one. So go ahead, crack a joke, share a laugh, and keep the mirth alive.

After all, a day without laughter is like a turkey without stuffing!

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